Friendly young cab driver (to the whore Shay) – Can I see you again?
Shay: Do you want to see me or see me?
– X (2011)
No, we’re no strangers to whores.
Every color of cunt, Black, Brown and White, has paraded her wares before these demanding, lascivious eyes when bolstered by a generous wallet.
Except on one occasion, when Julia Roberts’ Vivian Ward sashayed her way into our hearts via Pretty Woman, not even on our best day did we stumble on two hookers as beautiful as the blonde Holly and the brunette Shay.
Ah, the mere thought of these Holly and Shay Randis is enough to makes us experience Nirvana.
Sheer sextasy. White Nirvana.
Of course, the cognoscenti would have by now recognized that we’re referring to the roles played by Viva Bianca (essays the role of the older hooker Holly) and Hanna Mangan Lawrence (plays the younger whore Shay) in the 2011 Australian film X.
Directed by Jon Hewitt on a script that he co-wrote with his wife Belinda McClory, X is the kind of film that most Indians will never hear of unless wise souls like SI bring it to the attention of these putzheads.
A tight. fast-paced, revealing (in the literal sense) thriller, X is a very well-made film that takes us into the dark underbelly of Sydney life where prostitution, drugs, crime and corrupt cops intersect.
Viva Bianca and her younger compatriot Hanna Mangan Lawrence set the screen afire with their performances and body-shows.
Following her mother’s death, 17-year-old Shay has run away from home and comes to Sydney. Where she quickly cuts up her dress into a revealing, alluring outfit, stands on the mean-streets of Sydney, gets into turf battles and ends up giving handjobs to horny old-men driving staid cars.
Holly, on the other hand, is a veteran, worldly wise whore having been in the oldest profession since she was 15. But she’s on the verge of giving it all up and heading to Paris where she intends to make a new life.
The paths of the two whores cross on a dark Sydney street accidentally, literally and figuratively.
When the two hookers witness a murder while on a call at a John’s hotel, their lives are in great danger.
Scared out of their wits, the two pretty whores do their best to run but the vicious killer following them is relentless and won’t stop until he finishes them off.
The chase is on.
But it’s not easy for the two whores. One of them won’t make it!
Indian Chutiyas forever angling for the sight of some fair skin will love X because although it has two X lesser than standard porn fare, it has lots of nudity, front and back, of both men and women engaging in all kinds of sexual calisthenics.
Hey, this is a movie about two prostitutes.
What did ya expect? Ladies in nine-yard saris singing Suprabatham?
Jon Hewitt delivers a well-crafted thriller that amidst all the violence and ugliness sports a redemptive core.
SearchIndia.com strongly recommends X. You can get the DVD at Blockbuster or Netflix
X Review – Lovely Film on 2 Pretty, Scared Whores added by SearchIndia.com on
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OFFTOPIC: was contemplating watching madrasapatinam.. and realised there a far better movie I’ve not watched.. Kala pani’, have you?
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0255289/
SearchIndia.com Responds:
No, we have not seen Kaala Paani. Have no intention of doing so.
We think Director Priyadarsan is a joker for the most part.
after going through a few reviews on imdb, kaala pani feels like it was inspired by ‘Schindler’s list’ concentration camp and such, here replaced by the andaman prison.
SearchIndia.com Responds:
If our memory serves us right, the Anadaman prison was known during British days as Kala Pani.
“X is the kind of film that most Indians will never hear of unless wise souls like SI bring it to the attention of these putzheads”
Oh dear wise soul :), two queries.
1) Who is Jon Hewitt?
2) Why should Indians update themselves with these movies when we don;t watch good movies on our own soil???
3) No matter what expletives you are gonna use (Chutiyas, putzheads, morons, maniacs et al), Indians simply don’t have time to watch “classic” ‘movies coz they are held up with thousand problems that need to solved on a daily basis.
4) Not everyone can come out of a bad day and watch classics like the Godfather, Schindler’s list, Dark Knight etc etc etc. For heaven’s sake, let US decide what we wanna watch. Do we ever tell you what to review?????????
SearchIndia.com Responds:
1. You write: Who is Jon Hewitt?
http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0382054/
Fixed typo. Thanks.
2. You write: Why should Indians update themselves with these movies when we don’t watch good movies on our own soil???
Good point.
But Gandhi never gave up after Chauri Chaura. 😉
So, in the footsteps of the Mahatma we persevere.
3. You write: Indians simply don’t have time to watch “classic” ‘movies coz they are held up with thousand problems that need to solved on a daily basis.
By your weird logic, watching Villu, Mankatha, Kuruvi & Sura will definitely reduce the daily commute time, make the Ayah come on time, get more mileage from your motorbike and prevent the boss from yelling at the employee. But if you watch good or ‘classic’ movies none of it will happen. 🙁
4. You write: For heaven’s sake…. Do we ever tell you what to review??
Only once a day. Look at your earlier comments today.
BTW, Children need adult supervision (of SI, of course). 😉
“”3. You write: Indians simply don’t have time to watch “classic” ‘movies coz they are held up with thousand problems that need to solved on a daily basis.
By your weird logic, watching Villu, Mankatha, Kuruvi & Sura will definitely reduce the daily commute time, make the Ayah come on time, get more mileage from your motorbike and prevent the boss from yelling at the employee. But if you watch good or ‘classic’ movies none of it will happen.”
Nope, watching movies like Villu, Jillu, Mankatha, Ungatha, and Korangu makes our days worse. Plus, when I said Indians don;t have time to watch classic movies, I emphasized on CLASSIC movies because SI always makes a fuss about them. It doesn’t mean that Indians have time for crap movies. Nobody wants to burn 200 rupees to watch thrash like Kuruvi, Villu, or Sura.
Yes, I did watch Mankatha and mentioned that it is watchable once.
4. You write: For heaven’s sake…. Do we ever tell you what to review??
Only once a day. Look at your earlier comments today.
Yeah, last time I saw the dictionary, I saw the following meaning for the words “Tell” and “Request”
Tell: Instruct, inform, or order someone to do something
Request: Put forth an obligation.
While I put forth obligations for you to request movies (Which you never do anyways due to lack of time or interest), you TELL us that we are morons if we don’t XYZ movies. 🙂
SearchIndia.com Responds:
Hey, we did review Agneepath for you, and only for you.
The review even has a dedication to you at the top.
Good Lord, Karan Johar is remaking this garbage now with Hrithik.
“Hey, we did review Agneepath for you, and only for you.
The review even has a dedication to you at the top.”
Yes. Thanks for reminding. I learned a great lesson from that post.
One of the worst mistakes I ever did was to recommend a movie that I had watched eons back instead of Sethu, Kaasi, Pithamagan, Mounam Pesiyadhe.
I must have had a bad day at office then, that one suggestion spoiled my whole reputation with SI and I don’t blame SI either. A big blunder indeed.
No excuses here, I went back to Youtube to get watch a few scenes from Agneepath and really didn’t like it.
Now, I understand why you never took chances to review Sethu, Eeram, Pithamagan, or Angaadi Theru. Maybe because I recommended them. Hmmm, it that were the case, I should stop it rightaway.
SearchIndia.com Responds:
We may have one or two DVDs from your above list. Let’s see.
“We may have one or two DVDs from your above list. Let’s see.”
Having known you over the years and your response towards certain films, I am not sure I would like to see you review Sethu or Angaadi Theru. Although I have seen both of them recently and know their potential, I am not so sure of recommending them. so request you to ditch it.
Even if you review these films, I am sure your response is going to be better than that of your Agneepath review. Let’s see.
I watched the highlights of the movie last week.. and I liked them
SearchIndia.com Responds:
What a coincidence.
When we first reserved X on NFLX it said ‘short wait’…maybe, the DVD was in NC.
Unless, of course, your fingers played some ‘streaming magic’ with the left-mouse click. 😉
I had cancelled the DVD-only plan before the price change took effect.. planning to cancel the streaming option as well and resume during the 2012 summer break.
Viva Bianca is the Spartacus babe.
She’s more nude in Spartacus – it’s like almost whenever she appears, either she is nude or watches some guy nude.
SearchIndia.com Responds:
Looks like Spartacus is our kinda movie. 😉
Boy, isn’t she pretty!
>> Boy, isn’t she pretty!
She is very very pretty. In one scene there is a young boy in bath tub and she enters totally nude into it trying to seduce him. I went horny as hell. Could have sent you the link but my comment may get into spam.
In yet another scene, the Capua prince will make all the gladiators naked on the field so that she can choose one of them. It shows full frontal nudity. Spartacus is tooooo much.