How dare this bastard Suseenthiran do this to us.

Dai badava *#$%&@, unnae vandhu paathukuraen da (we’re gonna fix you real bad).

What the f*ck is wrong with Suseenthiran, director of the new Tamil film Naan Mahaan Alla?

Here’s our diatribe vis-a-vis this bastard:

* Did no one tell this bastard that Tamil movies ought to be unwatchable horror shows?

* Did no one tell this bastard that none of the actors in a Tamil movie ought to show even a spark of acting talent?

* Did no one tell this bastard that he ought to have picked Aishwarya Rai, Vijay, Ajith, Abhishek Bachchan, Vikram or Surya and then a la that heart-attacked, over-rated, super-flopped buffoon Mani Ratnam delivered a piece of shit?

* Did no one tell this bastard that Tamil films ought to look downright bizarre with vulgar song/dance sequences from Iceland, Machu Picchu, Malaysia and Mexico and crude comedy featuring Vadivelu or Vivek?

* Did no one tell this bastard with no Godfathers in Kollywood that he ought to have stayed back in his village near Palani and grazed cows?

How dare Suseenthiran flout all the basic rules of Tamil filmdom and deliver a decent movie.

The effrontery!

Somebody, get us our .357 Magnum. We’re gonna shoot this bastard, right now.

Suseenthiran, what a sweet bastard! 🙂

Here we were, all ready to do another headline like Vile Trash, Lift the Middle Finger, Colossus of Nonsense et al and this sweetie-pie Suseenthiran comes and spoils it all. 😉

Decent Film

Schmucks, now don’t y’all get us wrong.

We’re not, not heralding the advent of a Coppola or a Spielberg on the cinematic stage here but the arrival of a talented film-maker, talented by Tamil Indian movie standards.

Nor is Naan Mahaan Alla a masterpiece. For a masterpiece would be a complete contradiction in terms where Tamil movies are concerned.

But Naan Mahaan Alla is doubtless a decent, watchable film.

No question about it although the movie tended to lurch this way and that in the first half particularly around the romantic scenes and the ‘love-failure’ drivel.

Again, at the end there were some issues with the story, at least by our reckoning.

Hey Suseenthiran, let’s not forget your four bad guys are crafty scumbags who managed to overcome one of the biggest thugs in the city and his henchmen and yet they are all overpowered by one person at the end! That sure seemed off-key to us.

Still, it didn’t irritate us all that much given the overall high entertainment quotient of the film.

Its limitations aside we’d still insist the story was fairly engrossing.

The music was alright. Not the stuff of legend but nothing hideous either like that fart we heard recently.

The story outline, if you really want to know, is actually two separate pieces that intersect around the middle of the film.

The first piece centers around Jeeva (Karthi), a carefree young man given to loafing around with his buddies and romancing the girl Priya (Kajal Agarwal).

The second and darker element of the movie is around a bunch of young savage criminal elements, given to raping, doing drugs and killing people.

Let’s Undo the Injustice

In India, the morons give all the credit to the actors and ignore the director, the architect of a movie.

Here at SI, we’re determined to undo this grave injustice to directors who tend to get overlooked in the craven assholic hero-worship by the jack-ass fans.

Guys, the credit here goes all to Suseenthiran, first and foremost. Let’s give him a big hand.

All-Round Fine Acting

‘Tis no secret that here at SI, we’re fans of Karthi.

The bloke is infinitely better than his older sibling Sori-Padam Surya and a billion gazillion times superior to his old man, that tail-less monkey ‘Jillu Jillu Gullu Gullu‘ Sivakumar.

In Naan Mahaan Alla, Karthi once again does justice to his role and delivers paisa vasool to the paying audience.

Like all fine actors, Karthi makes it all seem so effortless and natural. That sure must take a lot of effort to achieve that outcome.

Not just Karthi, the four or five guys cast in the role of the bad fellas did a commendable job too. Sorry guys, we don’t know your names.

Baby Got Boobs

Hey, what’s happening.

Just a few months ago, we were ruing that Kajal Agarwal was a man-chester. Now, where did those 34Bs in Naan Mahaan Alla come from?

Not that we’re complaining. But we want to know. We really do. 😉

Seriously, Kajal Agarwal doesn’t have much of a role in the movie.

In the few frames she was present, the girl did a good imitation of a constipated soul gritting her teeth in a desperate attempt to induce bowel-movements.

Kajal, have you tried Hajmola! 😉

Go for It

SearchIndia.com recommends that all ye schmucks with your throats tightly wrapped around the schlongs of Rajini, Vijay, Ajith, Surya et al watch this film.

A talented and hardworking film-maker like Suseenthiran deserves that much at least from Tamil movie-fans.

Directors like Selvaraghavan and Suseenthiran are a beacon of hope that all’s not completely lost in the wasteland of the Tamil film industry.

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Extra:
At a theater on the U.S. East Coast, there were about 28-30 people for the evening show on Thursday. The audience seemed to be engrossed with the film although as we were getting out we overheard a Kelavi (old lady) lamenting that Thillalangadi was better. We think she’s senile or maybe she ate one of those Salmonella-infected eggs (we have a massive egg recall in the U.S. going on now). 🙁

  Karthi, Naan mahan Alla, Suseenthiran